What you don’t get is:
Given the same conditions, some people have more obstacles put in their way than others.
Saying „I can look after myself“ from a position of privilege is easy.
But taking care of yourself AND removing the obstacles for others so they have the same chance to succeed like you is hard.
And yes: it can make you miserable. Especially when egoistic people keep adding those obstacles again.
Extreme politicians having more leverage, in situations where the lead of the majoritiy party is very thin, is actually very common in most democracies.
The specific stupidity of the American democracy is the „winner takes it all“ rule which leads to a two party system.