• umbraklat@lemmy.sdf.org
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    1 year ago

    My least favorite is

    Just be yourself!

    Even in grade school I knew this was hogwash. I didn’t act the same in class as during recess, or in church as when at the dinner table. Exactly which me was I supposed to be? When someone asks, “What am I supposed to do?” They are really asking, “How should I behave?” And if you’ve never been on a date before, or this is your first job interview, then it’s not obvious.

    A: “So, how did the interview go?”

    B: “Not so well, he threw my resume away, in front of me, and ordered me to leave.”

    A: “What? Why?”

    B: “Well, I did just as your said, I was being myself. I walked in, gave him the ol’ finger guns, then started with my best fart joke.”

    A: “Why the hell would you do that at an interview?”

    B: “Because that routine always slays in the dorms and I was trying to be myself.”